You'll be proud of me.

I spent last weekend gently thinking about whether or not to request a different u/s tech for my upcoming pelvic ultrasound. I say gently thinking because when the thought of what choice to make came up in my mind, I would turn it over. Check the feeling in my body and then move on, mentally. As the weekend ended, I knew I'd be calling to canx the appt w/my OB's ultrasound tech (which is in-office). And request a referral to someone else!

I called the OB office on Monday. I had to wait on the phone, of course. While I was waiting I felt nervous. Again, I want to pro-for my health, but I don't want to rock the boat or make people feel bad. Screw them, me first!! But I felt a little nervous. As I waited, memories started coming to me. Reminders of why I am not a fan of that ultrasound tech or her work. I knew there was the biggie about not measuring Mini G correctly in the first 6 weeks. I also remembered something I'd repressed. After I had my D&C, I had a blood test to check my hormonal levels. I was still showing as pregnant so I had an ultrasound. The usual u/s tech was there and a young girl in scrubs walked in w/her that I didn't know/hadn't met before. The u/s didn't review my file before coming into the room or before she started the procedure. As a result, she asked me a lot of questions and didn't even remember that I had been pregnant.

Before I answered, I asked who the girl was that was in the room and the u/s tech said, "She's with me." I thought I might let out an expletive or two. Not call the lady a b* or anything. But I might've said what the f does that mean? and I didn't want to do that, so I bit my lip. G Money was in the room at the time and he didn't say anything. The u/s wanted answers to her questions. Questions she would've known had she read my file. I looked to G Money to remind her that I had been pregnant, had a D&C, etc... but he didn't understand that I was silently asking him to advocate. I can see how dealing w/my strong willed, always at the ready with what to say ways has him often observing in these types of situations, but I really wished he would've sensed the need to protect and jumped in. I ended up giving her the answers thru tears. I suppose I should've complained to my OB at that point, but I was still dealing w/the miscarriage, not to mention the fact that remaining fetal tissue was found and I needed to have a 2nd D&C. See? Potentially adding more stress in the way of registering a complaint -- valid or not -- just wasn't a card I had the energy to play. Especially after one of the nurses at the hospital remarked across me to another nurse, 'She's just having a D&C,' when I had the first procedure. From time to time I still think about writing a letter to the hospital to complain about HER! It was a long road to have my Mini G.

I digressed. This is a long way of saying I am going to a medical imaging dept at the hospital to have my ultrasound. There was no issue or questioning from the OB's office about why I wanted to go elsewhere. My OB might ask why I wanted a referral, the next time I see her. I feel pretty confident I will finally tell her that the one she has isn't a match for me and why. I have the u/s soon. It's to check for fibroids. I hope there are few to none and if there are any, I hope they are small.

Thanks for reading. I always appreciate the comments, even though I don't have time to type back and say so. :)


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